Draped memories of fond bitter hurt
When once, you were in the dirt. Above the grass
Where’d the flowers grow? Those toys weren’t built to last
The stink in my breath, is the stink in my nose
The bone in my hand is from a boy unknown.
Like that boy I once liked, he said “girl, you got it”
I replied, “I got what?” and then he just left, left without telling me what
And you know what?
In the scheme of the darkness, the texture of awakening in the dizzyness of nothing
I can still smell my breath
Deep in my mouth
Around my fingers
You should have caught me before you shut the door,
a kiss on the mouth
is nice
every
once and a while
and there’s that door of beaded hopes, weaved desire, and that violent goodbye
Keeping the same is dragging the dead and you wrote me again,
“Dear girl who I knew would break my heart,
You’re a filthy fucking bitch. I wish I never met you.
I can’t get enough of you. I hate you. Why am I so obsessed with you?
Please write me back.”
And you signed it “- A boy I hope you remember”
And it’s neat, the private and sweet
The generating of glistening tide breaks
A moment takes some time
Time, not enough, not good enough, not long enough,
But, too short, too fast
Break your shadows
Heating warm, a lover – behind – we’re back there at the time
When I didn’t just say that immature thing
Hey. I’m growing, you see?
Cluttered photographs, light image fantastic
And that smell is in my nose
In my mouth, that smell is tasting my teeth
My gums, my cheeks,
That smell is moving – it’s deep, you scum
Undone, candle light, and skin
Soft skin – scattered all along the floor
All up in, that smell.
Do you smell it now? That smell in my nose,
That smell in my mouth
That smell
Of
You
You
In
Me.
